It's here!

It's been some time.

Just got through a down time. Down as in you know how sometimes you start to think about what you're doing with your life?

Work was draining. It was a non-stop "peak period" from November till March and only started to slow down recently.

It got to me. I was tired and felt unaccomplished.

I felt uninspired too.

I was searching for an opportunity, for more strength, more determination and motivation.

The opportunity is here.

I'm very excited and is hoping for the best.

If this goes through, it'll be one of the best things that's happened in a long time. :)

This is how I feel too.

Second disappointment

Google Reader is retiring.

I am let down by yet another RSS feeds reader.

I remember I started being an avid "blog reader" many years ago with Bloglines.

With Bloglines, I was able to catch up with friends' blogs, acquaintances', bloggers'.... Then my feeds subscriptions gradually grew to more than a hundred. Besides blogs, I subscribed to interesting websites or web pages. There were no restrictions to what I would follow. As long as it piqued my interest with one or two post(s), I would subscribe to it right away. Doesn't matter if subsequent posts are not my cup of tea, I can always unsubscribe at any time.

Through that crazy amount of "no holds barred" RSS feeds following, I got exposed to a whole new reality I never knew about. The wonders of the Internet.

There are things I would have never known from the news. Things I would have never seen in my life. Things that are not necessarily helpful information, but always an eye-opener to what's possible in this world.

There were many ugly things too. But those exposures also meant I am not living in a fantasy world.

Then Bloglines announced their supposed closure. It stunned me. I quickly looked for a replacement to export my subscriptions. And I found Google Reader. It sucked so bad at first I hated it when I started using it. Lousy layout. Ugly format.

I forced myself to get used to it. So even though Bloglines later said, "Hey we're not going after all!" I did not look back. Also, once trust is broken, it's not easy to build it up again.

Slowly, I got used to the Reader. I cleaned up my subscriptions, and then over the years, added more without any control or discernment (once again).

It was my trusty "newspaper", "television" and "books". For years, I cleared my feeds almost every, single, day.

I've only gradually stopped reading my feeds on a daily basis from last year onward. Due to wedding and a brand new life with the hubby... Plus, a new job. Then, it was peak period in that job from last year till now. So nope, no energy or time to do that. Furthermore, I was trying to wean myself off social media and the internet, so I can have more time for other things in the "real life".

Anyway, enough of digressing. Now, I feel so betrayed once again. The sad thing is, there is no comparable replacement this time round.

The hubby suggested NuffnangX. I knew about NuffnangX the moment it was announced. Actually sort of before it was announced? There were a lot of "teasers" about it.

Anyway, after it was launched, I never got it as I never needed it; I also didn't like how it's mainly for following blogs. With the range of feeds I have.... I refused to be restricted.

Right now, I kinda have no choice. So I exported some of my feeds to NuffnangX and is trying to see if I can work things out with it soon.

It is not able to "find" some feeds I've been following for a long time. And I am kinda lazy to have to send a ticket to them regarding this... So we'll see then. Also, personally I feel that feeds subscriptions should be something personal, but NuffnangX is like some other social media (e.g. Tumblr and Twitter) in terms of the lack of a choice for privacy in whoever you are following. That loses point with me. (Not sure if I'm too new and doesn't know of such settings, we'll see) I have feeds that are NSFW... So not everyone would be agreeable to the contents. I would like to keep such subscriptions private. No, it's not perverted contents (just stuff that can be controversial, offensive or graphic), nor am I trying to pretend to be a prude or pretend I don't see such things. It's just that... in this current era, it'll be better to not expose everything about yourself on the internet. For possible snooping by your employers, or future employers. Or you may never know if it would affect you in the future in any way.

Anyway, so far, I'm not too happy with the NuffnangX app. Some posts just wouldn't load. I am also not used to the layout yet.

Maybe I'll grow to like it eventually, who knows. But right now, I hate you Google!

We had such a great relationship, Google Reader and I. :(

p.s.: Not sure why, since the Google Reader announcement, and after exploring NuffnangX, I've kinda gone back onto Tumblr. Not as active as I was before, but I realised I still like Tumblr very much. Pretty much at a crossroads right now in terms of giving up some feeds that NuffnangX is unable to find, or manually visiting them occasionally.

p.p.s.: Formspring is also shutting down! Not that it concerns me 'cause I don't use it. But I'm surprised by the fact that it lasted for so long. Haha...

Just one chance...

Every day, I look forward to the possibility of receiving an email or a call to go for an interview.

Despite having no response so far, I am not giving up.

I believe, my 伯乐 will "spot" me soon.

Someone, who can sense my sincerity and recognise how much I have to offer.

I am not seeking a high post that requires a lot of experience in that particular field... I just want a chance to show that, despite having not much relevant experiences, I can learn well and learn fast. I am capable of doing so much more.

I can. Just give me a chance to show you. I will not disappoint you.

I have many qualities that is transferable to any context. I have many skills that is applicable to positions in many fields.

Just one chance.

I am going to unleash my untapped potential and do my best.

You will not regret it.

Short-term goals

I was feeling really upset just now.

I think it was out of frustration.

My Sims character is currently pregnant. My bad, because I made them try for a baby... not knowing it's a "guaranteed deal". Thought it would take at least a few tries.

Well, only the husband Sims is working now. Take home pay is $40/hour. The shower was stolen by a burglar. Had to build a room for the baby... buy a cot, high chair and books on pregnancy.

All that cost so much now my Sims are almost broke.

It reminded me of reality.

I felt that everything was out of my control. As much as I am doing my best, I can't seem to catch up with the natural progression of life.

He wants a baby, in real life. I used to want a baby when I was much younger. But right now? No.

Why not?

1. Our home is not ready yet and when it's ready, we need money for furniture and renovation.
2. We're not earning enough yet. I want to be able to provide a decent sum of money for my mother before I even think about having a baby.
3. He's not ready in my opinion.
4. I am not ready.
5. I am not confident I can be a good mother.
6. I want my freedom, as selfish as this may sound. I still want to travel to countries I've never been before... 
7. I want to get into a new job and settle down in it comfortably.
8. It's a huge commitment and it's for life. 24/7. It's going to be tiring.

And there are so many more considerations that we have to think about.

That will have to take the backseat for now. 

I just want to fulfill my short-term goals for now.

• Get a new job and settle in it.
• Exercise more and join a marathon.
• Learn a new skill or take up a new course.

I will achieve these goals within these two years. I must.

The SIMS 3

[Source: http://sims.wikia.com/wiki/The_Sims_3]

The hubby and I got the game last weekend. We talked about it before, but I was not very keen as I think it's a very addictive game. Addictive games take away too much of your time. However, it was selling at a low price at the game shop we were in... so we decided to get it. :P

Just like how I felt when I started the Facebook version of The Sims (a long time back)... I was very frustrated at first. The characters were always hungry, tired or urgently needed to pee. I got them into jobs too soon as well and had no time to develop their relationship.

Through that, we kinda realised... isn't that like what real life is about for a lot of people? Or couples to be exact.

Everyone's so busy with work, with their own needs... there's little time left to maintain or develop relationships.

I made the characters quit their jobs. Coordinated the fulfilment of their needs and got them to spend time together. :D

Now they are happily married!

I haven't figured out how to get the photos I've taken in the game... if not I would post them here. Haha...

Anyway, if only real life is as easy as the game in terms of surviving without a job... endless supply of food in the fridge... and life is all about maintaining the home, relationship and your personal interests. And if you want to work, you can always start low at a company that you really want to work at and advance your career from there...

That would be so perfect.

Candy... crushed.

Yep, this is about Candy Crush Saga. The game that the whole world is playing right now.

I had refused to jump onto the bandwagon when it first started to gain popularity. This is because, I get annoyed when something is too overhyped. Plus, all the invitations on FB made it even more annoying.

Then, I was extremely bored one day... and I tried it on FB. Refused to download the app because I was sure I wouldn't be hooked like everyone else.

Boy, was I so wrong.

I got hooked. 

I like the challenge it gives me.

It's also a race to see who can climb higher, faster.

I've been playing with it everyday since then. 

This is my level now:

Nothing compared to the levels a lot of my friends are at right now. :/

But it's getting a little annoying once again. Furthermore, the hubby isn't too pleased with all that playing time I've been spending on this game...

So I've decided to get to level 100 and stop.

Two more levels to go and I'll "retire" from this madness.

No more Candy Crush.

Time to crush the game and throw it in the "bin". :)